Gossip- Standing In the Way of Control
Honeyblood- Killer Bangs
Brody Dalle- Rat Race
Hunter Valentine- The Stalker
Sleater-Kinney- Dig Me Out
50 Foot Wave- Vena Cava
Gossip- Standing In the Way of Control
Sharon Van Etten- Afraid of Nothing
Honeyblood- Super Rat
Courtney Barnett- Are You Looking After Yourself
Sharon Van Etten- Every Time the Sun Comes Up
PHOX- Slow Motion
Rubblebucket- Came Out Of A Lady
Tegan and Sara- Goodbye, Goodbye
Sharon Van Etten’s new album is amazing. It’s only 6.99 on Amazon.
Music is powerful. It can evoke emotional responses, taking you right back to happy times and sad times and all the times in-between. It can also help you get through hard things, like breakups. Breakups are terrible. You cry, you don’t eat, you don’t sleep, and you’re generally miserable. Songs about breakups don’t make it hurt less; in fact, sometimes, they just make you cry more. But sometimes, that is exactly what you need to process the whole thing.
These are some of the songs that have helped me through my recent breakup. If you’re going through something similar, or if you just need a good cry, this is the playlist for you.
Allison Weiss- “I Had To Do It”: This song sums things up for me. I loved her, and I initiated the breakup. Even though I know it’s for the best, it still sucks.
It’s selfish and I’m sorry,
But you know I had to do it
And I’ll miss you every second,
But you know it’s for the best.
If my weary heart were well enough
I’d stay and let you keep it
But to know you is to love you
And I don’t want to love you anymore.
There are other songs from Allison Weiss that are good breakup songs, especially ones from her album “Say What you Mean,” which has become my personal soundtrack these last few weeks. Oddly, most of them are really upbeat in tempo, but often really, really sad.
Ani DiFranco- “Untouchable Face”: This song doubles as a classic breakup song, or a song about unrequited love. The chorus can fit into most breakups when you reach the point of being mad. Sometimes, all you want to do is tell the other person “fuck you.”
So fuck you
And your untouchable face
And fuck you
For existing in the first place
And who am I
That I should be vying for your touch
And who am I
I bet you can’t even tell me that much.
Ani’s song “As Is” is another great angry breakup song. Though if the lyrics fit your ex to a T, I’m so, so sorry, and you’re better off without her, trust me.
What bugs me
Is that you believe what you’re saying
What bothers me
Is that you don’t know how you feel
What scares me
Is that while you’re telling me stories
Believe that they are real.
Jenny Owen Youngs- “Fuck Was I”: At some stages of a breakup, you look back and are grateful for the good times. At other stages, however, you regret the whole thing, from beginning to end, and wonder why you ever fell for someone who would end up causing you so much pain. This is a song for those “What the fuck was I thinking?” moments.
Love grows in me like a tumor,
Parasites bent on devouring its host.
I’m developing my sense of humor,
Til I can laugh at my heart between your teeth,
Til I can laugh at my face beneath your feet.
Christina Perri- “Jar of Hearts”: Another song for angry-at-the-ex moments, particularly for those times when you feel you have been used and are just another heart in a jar.
And who do you think you are?
Runnin’ ’round leaving scars
Collecting your jar of hearts
And tearing love apart
You’re gonna catch a cold
From the ice inside your soul
So don’t come back for me
Who do you think you are?
Tegan and Sara- “Call It Off”- Anger is a key component to any breakup, but let’s be honest here – you also miss her, sometimes more than you ever thought possible. You start to wonder if you made the right decision in ending things, but she won’t talk to you, or maybe she’s already moved on to the next person, and you just feel bad and sad. Then you remember all the red flags, broken promises, and why you’re better off without her.
But now we’ll never know
I won’t be sad
But in case
I’ll go there
To make myself feel bad
There’s a chance
I’ll start to wonder
If this was the thing to do
A Fine Frenzy- “Almost Lover”: This song is heartbreaking. For me, it’s about being led on. It’s about someone giving you false hope and all the “what ifs”. You make big plans for a future for the two of you, that never happened, and now they never will. You can’t see your life without her right next to you. Then you open your eyes and see that those dreams were never going to happen anyway.
Goodbye, my almost lover
Goodbye, my hopeless dream
I’m trying not to think about you
Can’t you just let me be?
So long, my luckless romance
My back is turned on you
I should’ve known you’d bring me heartache
Almost lovers always do
Melissa Etheridge- “I’m The Only One”: You try to be everything for this person, you’d do anything for her. And it still wasn’t enough. Melissa has a few things to say about this.
But I’m the only one
Who’ll walk across the fire for you
And I’m the only one
Who’ll drown in my desire for you
It’s only fear that makes you run
The demons that you’re hiding from
When all your promises are gone
I’m the only one
Robyn- “Dancing on My Own”: Whether you left her or she left you, it always hurts to see the one you love with another woman, while you’re on your own. It takes energy to remind yourself that it’s better to be alone than to be with someone who acts like you don’t matter.
I’m in the corner
Watching you kiss her
I’m giving it my all
But I’m not the girl you’re taking home
I keep dancing on my own.
Katie Todd – “Leave”: The excuses. Other people. The deceit. It’s exhausting and sometimes, you just need to leave and do what’s best for yourself, regardless of how much you loved that person and much it now hurts to say goodbye.
Necessary actions taken only so you’ll land on your feet.
And consequences with an action, overthrown in this distraction, please.
And even when the stars align there’s always something caught in your teeth.
This and that it’s always something with you, I’ve run out of steam.
Adele- “Rolling In the Deep”: What breakup playlist would be complete without a song from Adele? This song is an angry song. You’ve been wronged and you’re mad as hell and bent on revenge. But the song is also a contrast between the relationship’s potential and it’s reality. Your ex was perfectly capable of giving you everything you needed, but for whatever reason, just didn’t.
There’s a fire starting in my heart
Reaching a fever pitch, it’s bringing me out the dark
Finally I can see you crystal clear
Go ahead and sell me out and I’ll lay your shit bare
See how I leave with every piece of you
Don’t underestimate the things that I will do
The scars of your love remind me of us
They keep me thinking that we almost had it all
Breaking up is never easy, regardless of the circumstances, but hopefully, you can learn from your mistakes and grow as a person and come out better in the end. Music will be there to help get you through the rough times.
Originally published on lesbian.comRead More
Music can help through bad times. This playlist has a lot of sad songs, with a few angry songs in the middle. Going through a breakup is never fun.
If you’re going through something similar, I hope this playlist helps you. Be sad, then find your mad, then move on.
Allison Weiss- I Had To Do It
Ani DiFranco- Untouchable Face
Sarah Blackwood, Jenni Pleau, and Emily Bones- Wrecking Ball
Allison Weiss- How To Be Alone
Gossip- Yr Mangled Heart
Melissa Ferrick- Some Kinda Nerve
Sleater-Kinney- One More Hour
Tegan and Sara- Call It Off
Sinead O’Connor- The Last Day Of Our Acquaintance
Allison Weiss- Nothing Left
Tegan and Sara- Nineteen
Christina Perri- Jar of Hearts
Allison Weiss- I’ll Be Okay
A Fine Frenzy- Almost Lover
Allison Weiss- Making It Up
ZZ Ward- Last Love Song
Jenny Owen Youngs- Fuck Was I
Melissa Etheridge- I’m The Only One
Robyn- Dancing on My Own
Kristen Ford knows no genre. Her new album DINOSAUR is an intelligent collection of songs encompassing reggae to pop to country to folk and everything in between. Recently, she took time to discuss DINOSAUR, her influences, and her upcoming tour.
Who are your musical influences? Perhaps I’ll move chronologically, as there are so many great artists it’s hard to choose! Blink 182 was the first band I fell in love with- music blasting, jumping around the room singing along with air guitar. I bought an electric later that year and started playing. At an Ani Difranco concert when I was 15 or 16, I decided this was what I wanted to do for a living. She just had the whole audience in the palm of her hand- such power with a voice and an acoustic instrument. One woman. I had never experienced such a feeling. Radiohead creates sonic textures and feelings I feel are unmatched anywhere. I do enjoy Phoenix. Audrey Ryan is a local Boston hero, a mentor and friend of mine. Recently I discovered The Oh Hellos and Typhoon. I dig them both. Oh and the Beatles! They need some press bad.
Who would be a dream songwriter/band to collaborate with or tour alongside? I would just die to open for Ani Difranco on a tour. I would love to have something produced or co-written by Jon Brion. It would be fun to do some co-writing with Kasey Musgraves, she’s really taking country music in a new direction.
How would you describe your music? Indie Rock. Everyone seems to think I can’t pick a genre, which is true. I really love country, disco, EDM, folk, hip hop, reggae, distortion and rock n roll. I can’t stand it when a band launches into their live set and the first 2 songs sound exactly like all the other songs. I always want variety and to push the envelope musically in terms of what I can comprehend and what we can play as a band. For example “El Camino” on the new album, we worked with Auto-Tune very obviously in the verses- sort of a nod to 2014 pop songs and hip hop today. On “Internet”, we wanted to make an electronic dance tune- working with live instruments and creating loops, with super polished modern Tegan and Sara style harmonies. It was all very fresh and challenging. That’s why I play music, to be a child again and create and make mistakes and find the joy in it all.
What is your creative process like for songwriting? Usually it just pours out of me. I’ve got a moment and some space and the words and music happen with the guitar in my hand. Sometimes I’m on my bike and have to pull over and sing into my phone and record the melody and try to piece it together with accompaniment later. I’ve also played with the same band for the past couple of years. They are very helpful. I’ll bring them a verse and a chorus and they’ll help with tempos or finding a good way to get from section to section. I have to trust them when they say “ this is just like another song you wrote”, and they have to trust me when I say “No, give me this feeling” or “Make it faster, dance bitches!”.
What inspires your songs? Life. I see so much in the world I want to talk about, I want to change, I want to understand. I also know you can’t make anyone do anything they don’t decide on their own. When you call someone a faggot or say the N word, as a bi-racial lesbian, I’m very offended! Just saying “Hey!” doesn’t do anything. But you’ve got a song like “Zeda” that I wrote, and I’ve heard people tell me it’s made them cry or feel very intensely. That’s the power of music. I’m also inspired by my life, at my own ability to make a complete mess of things, and not see it coming. Music is my way to release and see myself out of it.
Is there a lyrical theme that tied DINOSAUR together? I would say DINOSAUR is about my journey to Wyoming and back last year. I learned so much and got out of my comfort zone…my little Boston hipster, liberal bubble. It’s about falling in love and struggling to make your living and learning to laugh through it as you make your way in this world.
How does DINOSAUR differ from The Grindstone? DINOSAUR was a very different project from the Grindstone. I’m older now, with at least 400 more shows under my belt. I worked with Producer Jesse Ciarmataro on DINOSAUR, where The Grindstone was self produced. The Grindstone was made in a homemade studio, mixed in LA where I made edits across the country, and on a fraction of the budget we had on DINOSAUR. I felt the funds we had raised through a grant and Kickstarter donations, made it possible for me to work in the studio of my dreams, be very involved in the mixing process, and work with great people every step of the way. I hope this will be the project to put me on the map in a bigger way. I’m very proud of it, proud enough to move into a van, quit my 3 jobs and tour full time to promote it.
A lot of indie artists are opposed to giving away music for free, but you’ve given away entire albums. What is your reasoning for giving it away? I may be changing the free music format soon, at least on the new stuff. However, less and less people are paying for media. TV shows, music… you can find it for free. If you stream my music on Spotify, I need 1,000,000 streams to get $400. So far I think I’ve been paid 30 cents over the past couple years from Spotify. If you rip it from YouTube the sound quality will be terrible. I’d rather you download off of Bandcamp free of charge, share your email address, then we can connect on a tour, or on my next crowdfunding campaign. I would rather gain a fan and lose out on a couple of dollars on an album that’s already paid for, than hoard an album and have no one hear it.
What is your favorite song to perform? Why? I like “Ah Ooh Ooh” because it’s so fun and dancey. At Northampton Pride we had a sign language interpreter, and it was fun watching the sign for “Ah ooh Ooh” which is a made up sound.
What is coming up for the remainder of 2014? Living in a van, touring the country. Notably I’ll be playing on the mainstage at National Women’s Music Festival in Wisconsin on June 26th. I’ll be experiencing Michigan Womyn’s Festival as sound crew, which should be a trip. Then we’re headed back to the dude ranch in Wyoming. This should be a busy summer and super fun fall. If the van is still running, we plan to head to the south and west coast in early 2015. You can follow the travels of me and my girlfriend at http://catvsowl.wordpress.com/.
For more information about Kristen Ford, check out her website www.kristenfordmusic.com.Read More
Lake Street Dive- You Go Down Smooth (Live at The Lizard Lounge)
Ani DiFranco- Firedoor (Live)
Allison Weiss- I Don’t Want To Be Here (Live at Sidewalk NYC)
Alabama Shakes- Hang Loose (Live at KEXP)
Sleigh Bells- Comeback Kid (Live Acoustic)
Antigone Rising- Better (Live from NYC)
Joan Jett & The Blackhearts- I Hate Myself For Loving You (Live)